Sunday, July 13, 2014

Codpiece of Sir Jonad du Longlake, the Chaste.

Sir Longlake was the most beautiful and renowned dragonslayer of his age. His charm made him a popular guest at court and many a noblewoman would invite Sir Jonad to guard their estates while their husbands were away. In addition to hs beauty, charms and martial prowess he was said to posses other qualities, including one that earn him the nickname, Longlance.

Then, on a Quest to slay the Great Serpent of Veel, Sir Jonad was said to have a vision, one that caused him to give up dragonslaying and take vows with the Church of Prudent Vestial to become a true Paladin. When the news of his taking the tonsure got out, several noble maidens took vows at the Nunnery of Pafian and at least one threw herself into the Stone River. 

Unfortunately, Sir Jonad's quest ended when he faced the dreaded Vampire of Fartingdale armed with nothing but the a copy of the Book of Prude and an antiorgastic relic said to contain the pubic bone of Saint Hymen. 

When the sun rose the next morning, Sir Jonad's part entered Fartindale to search for the brave paladin, but all they ever found was his codpiece. It was returned to Manroot Abbey where it joined other sacred relics in the Great Hall of Abstinence. 

Many years later however, the codpiece is said to have disappeared. Rumours of its location have surfaced from time to time, each accompanied by tales of a great knight, unbeatable in battle, a master of charm and class, and as chaste as the newly fallen snow.

To wear the codpiece is to gain great prowess in battle and incredible charm that will stir members of the normally desired sex into an a bacchanalian frenzy. Unfortunately, removing the codpiece negates all bonuses, permanently, and creates an instantaneous negative reaction in anyone who was previous aroused. So much so that the unfortunate character will be forced to flee the area or face a slew of jealous husbands, partners and homicidally enraged family members.

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